Daily Archives: November 9, 2009

I Can Only Be Me

There are times when I struggle with how honest to be in Blog World. How private do I want to be? What secrets am I willing to reveal? How vulnerable do I want to be to complete strangers? Ok, some of you aren’t complete strangers anymore, but you get the drift.

I started this blog as an experiment. I had an idea for another blog, with a much more specific purpose. I created this blog to play around, get my feet wet, see what it’s all about. And I have to tell you: I’m having a blast.

Most of the time.

The other times I struggle. Not with what to say – but if I should say it. And if I’m saying it “right.” Oh, I have plenty to say. I’m not kidding. There have been times when I have the posts scheduled a week out with 6 more drafts waiting in the wings. But do I share it? Who else will I expose by sharing it (my family)? Who will judge me and what will they think when I share it?

And then there’s the pressure I put on myself. I wanna be funny like Shauna Glenn and The Bloggess. Or cerebral like Steven. Or host the perfect parties like Velva. Or write, with such grace as many of you do, about your children, your lives, your adventures. And now this is becoming a link-fest — but I think you understand what I’m saying. I read and read and read other blogs and I think, ugh. I could never be that funny, kind, smart, adventurous, have such great photos, write that beautifully, etc., etc., etc., after etc.

All I can do is what I do. I can only be me.

Hey. Now that’s a revelation. And I’d love to say I discovered it myself. I didn’t. I found it here.

I have a conversational tone to my writing. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s a valid style. I’m more the straight man with a few funny one-liners. Everybody needs a straight man. (Funny aside: when you google “famous straight man” about 1/2 the hits are about being gay vs. straight than about comedy duos. Oh, how the times they are a changin’!) I’m a Google nut. I’m interested in so many things I’ll never be an expert at any one thing. Eh, there are too many experts out there, anyway. I write in incomplete sentences. I like incomplete sentences. I’m a rule follower that sometimes doesn’t play by the rules. Deal with it.

You’re going to judge me. I’m going to offend you. Some may never come back to this blog again. But I promise you this: I will always be honest. I will always write from the heart. I am not perfect. I have moments and pieces of me that I’m not proud of. And you’re going to hear about one of them tomorrow.

 But it’s who I am.

Imperfect ME.

(P.S. Don’t forget about our get together Friday, November 13th. Collect the craziest search terms for your blog and we’ll all share them on Friday. You can write them in the comment section or blog about it – but don’t forget to link/comment here so we can all see them! See you Friday!)

18 Comments

Filed under Self Image, Soapbox