I’ve been saving my spam lately. No, not SPAM. (Which Hormel Foods, incidentally, has requested that you not use their trademark “all caps design” to refer to email/internet spam. You have been warned!)
I’m referring to the spam comments that appear in your comment box, waiting to be approved or deleted permanently. Usually, I just delete them. Quickly. I like a clean site. I’m all tidy that way. But lately I’ve been saving them. Why, you ask? Let me show you.
“I cannot believe this will work!” – This comment was for my Adoption Triangle of Love post. Of course “it works!” I just spent an entire post singing the praises of this wonderfully positive adoption symbol. On the other hand, maybe you’re criticizing my very personal and positive experience with adoption. And if that’s the case, put out your dukes, buddy! You’re in for the fight of your life.
“This brings me to an idea:…” – And? Yes? You were saying? I’m waiting. Please, please, please share. Because this comment was for my But Pee Is Sterile. Right? post. And from the amount of legit comments I received on that post I’m not the only one waiting for a solution to all the little errant pee-ers out there.
“An sich ne gute Sache, ich frag mich nur, ob das auch dauerhaft brauchbar bleibt.” – Frankly, I’m afraid to translate this. It was left for my The Word Parent Is Also A Verb post. I’m not very good at accepting criticisim. Constructive or in foreign languages.
“Sometimes it’s really that simple, isn’t it? I feel a little stupid for not thinking of this myself/earlier, though.“ – Really? Seriously? Are you kidding me? I just got done complaining in my Beware The Attack Of The Joy Suckers post. I didn’t offer any sage advice. There was no typical positive spin. It was just a rant. (Sorry if I disappointed any of you out there that day.) I was crabby. I wrote about it. I guess there’s simplicity in that. Hmmmm. Maybe I was wrong about this bit of spam.
“Good Article. I love your site, I’ll be back for your next article” – Left for my Blast From The Past post. For Wordless Wednesday. Yep, you guessed it. Just a picture of my adorable children. No article for miles.
“Hey I love the blog. I’ve been looking for more information on Cranial Salt Lake and I was wondering if you have any good tips or pointers? I’m getting ready to move and I need all the information I can get. Thanks!” – Huh? Cranial what? You thought I might be able to help you? Where is Cranial Salt Lake? You’re moving there? Sounds absolutely cerebral. Wait, is that next to Phrenic Heights? I think I know someone who lives on Analytic Ave. I heard you have to be pretty astute to live there. Or maybe you were asking The Kitchen Witch? Because this comment was left for my Trading Spaces With One Of My Neighbors post when TKW stopped in to share. Maybe I should ask her if she can help.
“Impressive site. My friends and I were just discussing this the other evening. Also your site looks nice on my old sidekick. And thats rare. Nice work.” – Found on my post Flummoxed Doesn’t Even Begin To Describe – And Neither Does Eliminate, Apparently . Interesting, that you and your friends would be discussing this very same thing. Do you know my friend? Do I know you? And what is a sidekick? But it’s rare that a site would look nice there? And mine does? Oh – flattery will get you everywhere! (I think I’m blushing!)
“imbTgW pxlldpqtudqv, [url=http://rllbdbdvbngx.com/]rllbdbdvbngx[/url], [link=http://ankluhryhgfc.com/]ankluhryhgfc[/link], http://quytvadkklea.com/” – And this was left for my Tag! You’re It! post. I can’t even decifer this comment. Is it in code? Maybe some computer nerds are fans! Do you think it might be alien? OMG. Do you think aliens are reading my blog? Wait. I have been a little jumpy lately with difficulty concentrating and increased sleep disturbances. All signs of an alien abduction! Do you think I was abducted?
I’m sorry. I’m going to have to stop here.
I think I’ve been abducted.
Theycallmejane's Blog 
Isn’t it crazy what they try? I don’t allow anonymous so I don’t get tooooo much of it, but I sure see it on other blogs!
Too funny…I think the aliens headed for my blog when they left yours.
Please don’t let the aliens take you Jane! We would miss you way too much!
LMAO! My fave is the “good article” response to the picture! Busted, spammers! Tee hee.
Thank you for starting my day with a giggle…no, more like a LOL. You’re so good at that! I’m going to sift through my spam and see what alien comments await me.
Hee Hee! I have one comment from someone promoting their “dry-eye” blog. I KID YOU NOT. SPAM, ha.
I’ve always been intrigued by those comments, and I have trouble erasing them. When you stick them together you get a weird kind of poetry. I took the word verification off my blog because it was causing commenters problems, so I guess I’ll just have to live with it.
You know what happens with aliens, right? Protect yourself!
Also, you know you’ve hit the big time when the spam rolls in.
Too funny. I’m an alien (legal from Canada), but promise not to abduct you. Or send spam. Or, for that matter SPAM, either. Both can be unpleasant. I received on the other day that I simply left up, though, because it was pretty funny. Obviously using some sort of translating device which made no sense and made me giggle at its ludicrousness.
It’s the little oddities that sprinkle over the day that mean so much.
SPAMSPAMSPAMSPAMSPAAAAAAAMMMM.
Sorry. Too much coffee today.
Perfect! Funny thing is, I’ve been holding onto some spam too because they just amuse me. The most astonishing was from ‘TotGlypepethy’: a 2,307 word response (I put it in Word to count the actual words…honest!) to one of my posts called ‘I Comment, Therefore I Am’. The spam comment is all about Aquired [sic]Pulmonary Hypertension. How nice of TotGlypepethy to swing by my way and tell me all that! 😀
I needed the laugh today! Thanks!
That was hilarious! I guess I haven’t been doing this long enough or had enough hits or searches cause I haven’t gotten any spam – YET. Kind of makes me jealous now! 🙂 Guess I’m not special enough. 😦 LOL
I wonder who gets paid to send that mess. And seriously, how much could they possibly make?
And if it’s decent money, where do I sign up?
I don’t get many strange ones, but I do get the very vague comments that make absolutely no sense in relation to what I’m writing about. There’s one who will make a comment on the very first sentence of my post when it may only be a lead in and have actually nothing to do with the post’s main point. I just roll my eyes on those.
Gah. I hate spam comments. It seems we all get some of these similar spams, too. I hate that people just throw whatever comment onto someone’s blog to get traffic to their own. Stupid spam.
I’m always amazed at what spam I get. I just wonder what the point is.
I have to tell you, Jane, just hit the empty spam button. It becomes a joy sucker if you don’t. LOL!!!
I’ve been getting so many crazy comments lately. Is there a Spam Season or something?
Stopped by on suzicate’s recommendation. Glad I did!
Haha, I just started keeping the spam too! And it’s always on OLD posts. I never get spam on the day of. Love your blog! Can’t wait to read more : )
This made me giggle. =)
Now I am offended. I haven’t received any spam! What the heck? Am I not cool enough or something? Or, perhaps, you have stolen all the spam stuff?
As for those aliens, I hear that you like to run, right?
I love those ones that claim that they love your community and they love how you write. At first I was all blushing, thinking someone was giving me a compliment. Duh. LOL.I love Akismet spam filter plugin. On the good days, I get dozens of spams. I certainly don’t want them to show up on my comment section.