Daily Archives: February 2, 2010

Jane’s Daughter Puts Dinosaurs On Notice

This isn’t the best pop song I’ve ever heard. But it made me giggle.


My daughter shared this with me on our mother/daughter date this weekend. And I absolutely MUST share it with you. But first, a little history.

Ever since my daughter “became a woman” visits to the mall are a little more entertaining. Every good mother says this, so I’ll just join the crowd, “My daughter is gorgeous.” Really. She turns heads. And I’ll never forget the first time I noticed two teenage boys ogling her. I turned into this crazy, bugged-eyed, red-faced dragon and I practically leapt down their throats with her pulling me away in shame and embarrassment. My baby was only 12 – barely a teenager herself. Horny little toads!

I thought that was bad. Ha! Then men started noticing her. Young men. But still. Men. And since she was fully developed (if you know what I mean) she could look older than she was. So I’ll forgive them this once.

So you have the horny teens and the young men who don’t know any better. Fine. I got used to it.

Now, my daughter’s definition of a dinosaur is anyone over 30. And since she’s only 17, that’s fine by me. I wear my fossilized label proudly. And you should, too! But there are some dinosaurs that need to stick with their own species.

You know who I’m talking about.

The creepy older men. Much older. Who are beyond embarrassment. Who probably have children of their own that age. Who are oblivious to their wandering eyes and spittle on their chin. Ewwwwwwww.

A few years ago we were at EPCOT in Walt Disney World during the Food and Wine Festival. By early evening, drunks were everywhere. One man, definitely a dinosaur, was obviously inebriated. Drooling over her. His eyes savoring every…I have to stop there. It was too creepy. I pushed her in front of me and said, “She’s only 14!” He licked his lips and said, “I know.”

Ewwwww. Ewwwww. Ewwwww.

“D-I-N-O-S-A   U R a dinosaur! Hittin’ on me…whaaaaa?”

She’s aware that she’s an object in some men’s eyes. She’s good at ignoring it. And even better at laughing about it.


Filed under Growing Up, Observations