29 | March | 2010 | Theycallmejane's Blog

Maureen at Island Roar

Jane from Theycallmejane's Blog

I was over at Maureen’s at IslandRoar on Wednesday and was struck by the photo introducing her post. Peeking out from behind a wall. It reminded me of a pic that my daughter took of me during our mother/daughter day in The Big City. Maureen’s post was part of a meme called “The Spin Cycle” by Sprite’s Keeper that many of you are familiar with and participate in. I’m a little late with this, but it got me thinking about “me” and who I am. How different we are and how we’re very much the same.

I have always been a bit unconventional. When I was a teen, I was this weird, hybrid, hippie, preppy chick. One day I’d wear a tye-dye t-shirt and jeans fraying at the ends with flip-flops or bare feet. The next day I was in a crewneck sweater, button down shirt with add-a-bead necklace and Pappagallo purse. No one thought it odd. That was just Jane.

I was a letterman athlete in AP classes who sang in musicals. I was a shy overachiever who felt very comfortable with public speaking. Quite honestly, I’ve never quite understood the paralyzing fear people have getting up in front of a group to speak. But put me in a social situation when I have to make small talk with people I don’t know? Major freak out. Complete with cold sweats and eyes darting around the room, searching for the escape route to a quick get-away.

Contradictions

I told all my friends, “Don’t get married until you’re 30!” – I got married at age 21.
I told all my friends, “Don’t have kids until you’re 30!” – We started trying when I was 25 and by the time I was 29 we had a sweet, adorable angel from Korea.
I will never get divorced. I AM Catholic, afterall. – Divorced at age 32.
Nurse until my baby is 2 years old? You’ve GOT to be kidding me! – Nursed my sweet boy until….well, read last Thursday’s post.
I never want to marry someone in law enforcement or healthcare. The fear of them dying (as with law enforcement) or the crazy long hours (as with both professions) is not for me. – I married someone in healthcare. Not QUITE the crazy hours but definitely long. We rarely eat dinner as a family. It’s usually just me and the kids.
I’m going to be a career woman (said in my teens and twenties). Staying home with the kids is archaic and old-fashioned. – I am currently a SAHM and I LOVE IT! Love it, love it, love it! It’s hands down the best job I’ve ever, ever had.

My life hasn’t been conventional. I have spent much of my life both celebrating and feeling tortured by my differences. But when I saw that picture on Maureen’s blog I was touched by how “the same” some of us are. And how that “sameness” is comforting and nice and OK.

The “Jane” in the title of my blog is supposed to represent every Jane (or John) out there. As in, Jane Doe. I wanted to be a voice for many of you. Someone who can put thoughts and feelings out there and behind the little computer screens or Blackberrys there would be a chorus of heads nodding up and down. I’ve since found that isn’t always the case. Sometimes it’s only a quartet or small ensemble. And sometimes it’s a massive choral event and we’re spilling off the stage and into the auditorium.

The Same

Like Sara and Jen at Momalom and Peg at Square Peg in a Round Hole and Suzicate at The Water Witch’s Daughter I have a wonderfully close relationship with my sister. Every one should be so lucky!
Conversations with her child, with incompetent wait staff or vet assistants – Nap, at Naptime Writing, is my soul sister!
We both use our blogs as therapy and we both crack up at the same things – Gotta love her! Absense of Alternatives.
And Big Little Wolf , Kristen and Aidan share my interest in looking outside the box, looking at the bigger picture and what it means for my/our future, and appreciating the simpler things in life.
The antics of Faemom’s sweet little boys reminds me of my own!
Erica at Pines Lake Redhead, another mother of boys, who has been there done that. The stories she shares of when they were little – I’m experiencing now. The stories she shares of her boys that are older than mine? I’m bookmarking for future reference!
Ck at Bad Mommy Moments makes me feel like I’m not alone with her brave posts on our blind journey in motherhood.
Bibliomama for our love of books and Peripheral Perceptions for our role as casual observers.
And then there is the inspiration for this post, Maureen at IslandRoar. She has a teen daughter at home, like me. We share a love of the arts, the same name. She appreciates her children for who they are and has no trouble honoring their need to express themselves (Ok, this is where I want to be more like her but I’m on the right path.) She’s like the big sister I always wanted.
If I mentioned everyone who visits here and who I visit – I’d be writing/linking into the weekend. My favorites folder overfloweth. Thanks to all of you who call me your Blog Friend. I love what we have in common.

One hand on the keyboard, the other stirring a pot, reading a story, or applying lipstick and trying to get the sexy back. We’re all different. We’re all the same. And I love it here!