Jane Readjusts Her Halo And Sets The Record Straight

I can breathe again! My little blog traffic graph is settling into its familiar groove. All of you have more elbow room when you enter my humble blog.

Ahhhh….Stretch out people! Relax!

For my dear, regular readers, I don’t think I have to explain my sense of humor. You were all keenly aware of yesterday’s tongue in cheek title, “Jane Finds God…” and my later quip, “God? Who is this God of which you speak?”

For my dear, new readers…..lemme ‘splain somethin’ to ya’…..

I am spiritual. I do believe in God. I go to church. I pray. I pray a lot. It’s what I do.

I do not go to any one church all the time.  I’ve been known to go to a synagogue. I’ve set foot in a mosque. I have a healthy curiosity in all spiritual choices and am continually questioning my own.

However, I don’t go into much of my beliefs here, on this blog. “Why?” you ask (halo tilted, pointing out scripture that says I should proclaim my faith from the rooftops). Because. I can’t. I won’t. And you can’t make me.

My husband calls me a “cherry picker” when it comes to my beliefs. I pick what I like and I skip over what I don’t feel comfortable with. Proselytizing is not something I can do. And you won’t find any of that here.

Your well-intentioned emails to me are appreciated. It’s kind of you to be worried for my soul. But have no fear. The God I believe in doesn’t give a wit if I sing his praises publicly or not.

But the reactions to my post yesterday have reminded me of comments made earlier on my blog (“I know you don’t believe in God but…”) and have re-stirred a curiosity that follows me in life (and I suspect, in my bloggy neighborhood.)

I tend to attract people who are either deeply religious (who later dump me when they find out they can’t convert me to THEIR religion) or agnostic/atheist. I have some friends in between but the two extremes are the ones who stand out.

The deeply religious cling to me (at first) because I’m a pretty moral, ethical person. OK. I’m a goody-goody. Fine. I’m Miss Polly Purebred. (There. I said it.) But lest you think I’m perfect, please, speak to my husband. He’ll confirm I am far from it.

That said, I still hate it that my neighbor steals course time on the golf course and leers after my daughter (the leering being the biggest irritation, of course.) I don’t drink very much. In fact, I’m a light weight. One glass of wine is tops for me – unless you want to see me without a top, which you don’t. Trust me. I’ve never smoked. And I’ve never tried illicit drugs.

But then, the deeply religious find out that I don’t care if other people drink. I think marijuana should be legal. I struggle with the death penalty and would never judge a woman for her choice in her right to choose.

With my agnostic/atheist friends? I think they’re just plain relieved that I’m not going to try to convert them and I accept them for who they are.

“One mountain, many paths.” It takes all kinds to make the world go ’round. In the huge scheme of things I suppose I really do like it that there are people out there stealing golf course time (although I could do without the leering). It challenges me to question, strengthen or change my belief system.

I want people in my life or at my blog who believe different things. I embrace those that live their life differently from mine. My regular readers are a crazy, amazing, interesting, fascinating bunch of souls. We have created our own sanctuary where all opinions matter and have relevance.

And you’re welcome to join in the fray. There are no dues, no rules, no attendance requirements. The only thing we won’t tolerate here is mean-spiritedness.

Oh, but you must leave comments. Because everyone loves comments.


Filed under Lessons Learned, Observations

24 responses to “Jane Readjusts Her Halo And Sets The Record Straight

  1. I was just talking to my husb today about my childhood fantasies that I have, surpassingly never shared with anybody. (Surprising because I AM a certified over-sharer). I wanted to be a swordswoman (think “Crouching Tiger”). As I talked more, I rattled off other fantasies: Kung fu master, Ninja assassin, etc. All involved violence, protecting the weak and seeing justice done. All fantasies. I am not a violent person in practice but I often visualize taking a 100-ton hammer to mean people. This is my very long-winded way of saying: “I am ready to beat up the meanies for you!” My brows are furrowed and inside my head they are being pulverized. Ahhh. I feel much better now. xxoo

  2. This resonates so deeply with me. Because I have talked about my spirituality, but I don’t go to church. That turns of religious folks. I believe in God, but I don’t care if anyone else does. It’s no one else’s business what the person next to you believes. If you want to talk about it or not, that’s fine. But I also am not one who adores the “I’m praying for your soul” comments. Please… my soul can kick a bunch of other souls butts…

  3. Hi Jane – I just finished reading the book Devotion by Dani Shapiro. I loved it and think you might like it too. It’s all about her journey to try to form “a set of feelings and instincts by which to live.” Ultimately, through yoga, meditation, and a lot of thinking, she connects with a “presence” that some might call God. I think you and I are in similar places on the religious cherry picking spectrum and I found her reflections really resonant.

    (Oh, and you know you’re going to have to try harder to get rid of me than simply confessing to being a Polly Purebred. Takes one to know one.)

  4. It’s like looking into a mirror! As per our previous conversations I know we have shockingly similar upbringings, but to see that our belief systems are so close… wow! “I tend to attract people who are either deeply religious (who later dump me when they find out they can’t convert me to THEIR religion) or agnostic/atheist.” — that’s SOOO me. One reason why I’m completely turned off religion–so many times I would try out a new church, to meet some friendly happy people who, the moment they saw I wasn’t interested in “being saved” would run off and I’d never see them again.

    More: legal marijuana=yes; death penalty=yes and no; right to choose=yes…. you might not want me in your community with so many similarities… not interesting enough!

    Religion is tricky: I’m pretty sure there is a god (but I don’t know why he’s so MAD at me all the time), but I don’t know if I believe the Bible is anything more than a myth…. as with the Koran and the Talmud…. or Confucius. Or any other religious writings. I’m pretty sure that neither Joseph Smith nor Ellen White were “prophets”… I’m pretty sure I could piss off a whole bunch of people with my beliefs and non-beliefs…. which is why I also don’t normally talk about it.

    I believe in being moral and ethical… very important… but get all wound up with people relating it directly to religion… only leads to hate. If people were all moral and ethical, despite their beliefs, what a wonderful world this would be.

    Should I get off my soapbox? Anyone wanna slap me?


  5. It’s always been clear to me you’re a spiritual person. I haven’t yet read yesterday’s post, so now I’m intrigued…..off I go.

  6. “We have created our own sanctuary where all opinions matter and have relevance.”

    Here, here, Jane!

    Like Maureen, I have not read your post from yesterday either. And I’m kind of happy that I haven’t. I like this post just as it is. With no backstory. Because it is you. Purely, sweetly, honestly, you!

  7. Oh brother. I get what you’re saying. I know that people mean well, but seriously, what ARE they thinking? Like Maureen, I’ve always sensed that you’re a spiritual person. Although some of your beliefs are different than my own, what’s the big whoop? The world would be a boring place if everyone were the same. 🙂 I’m around people all the time that have the same beliefs as me, and frankly, it’s refreshing seeing what other people have to say for a change!

  8. Steven Harris

    Three cheers for cherry-picking. And as for legalising marijuana, does that mean you’re a rastafarian? 😉

  9. We truly are twins….this is me in a nutshell. 🙂

  10. I certainly didn’t read anything into your last post–I thought it was funny?! Well, I must be fitting into your life according to pattern, because I like you and I’m an agnostic! 🙂

  11. I love this post to the tips of my toes. You and I have much in common.

  12. ck

    Whew! So relieved that I’m not the only Goody-Goody out there. I don’t judge what other people do (or try really hard not to, anyway), but I have a hard time when it comes to “rules” or what I perceive to be “the right thing.” Again, not for anyone else. But I can get annoying when I go searching for rules to keep…

  13. Oh my goodness, don’t do religion or politics when I’m out of town! I hate to miss out on anything. I’ll do my reading homework and be back.


    Ahem. Just to make it clear.


    I loved this post, Jane. I truly think it’s wonderful that you have belief in something you’re comfortable and sure of, and that you don’t judge others who don’t believe as you do. If all fanatics of religions could be more open-minded, more exploratory… Well, things would be better in the world. Just wanted you to know that I appreciate this post, and I think, as always, that you’re amazing.

  15. Yes! I was raised with morals and ethics, but not to judge and certainly not to push my ideas on others. Well, maybe about leering – which just is not okay.

  16. Megs

    Your attitude to religion/s seems very similar to mine – it’s a concept that utterly fascinates me. I very much have my ‘own ‘ religion, cobbled together of bits of others. At the end of the day, I believe in what I believe in and everyone should be free to do the same: whether its an old man sitting on a cloud or a turtle with a world on its’ back.

  17. angelcel

    Yes, it’s probably best not to make any religious references in public because all too often those who believe (in whatever and whoever it may be) have such a blinding fervour that they think *their* way is the only way and everyone else must therefore need saving. (You don’t sound as though you need saving to me). 🙂

  18. “I embrace those that live their life differently from mine. ” I love that you said that. I’ve always believed that respecting other people’s life choices doesn’t mean you are disrespecting your own.

    I am also reading Devotion, the book that Kristen mentioned. I also think it will resonate with you.

    Great post Jane.

  19. Missed your last post, and of course now I must read it…But, how I adore this one. Particularly the reference to the fact that you “cherry pick,” because frankly I think that’s perfect and that’s really what a belief in anything should be about. There is no one size fits all when it comes to spirituality because that would be ludicrious. We believe based on our experiences and the things that speak to us, and none of us live the same things.

    And this: “We have created our own sanctuary where all opinions matter and have relevance.” Well, I can’t resist. Amen woman!!

  20. Blimey you AND Mr Planet having your egos stroked 🙂 !! I too am a cherrypicking somewhat lapsed catholic (AND I’ve been married twice AND had children out of wedlock – GASP). I listened to an interesting discussion on the radio here yesterday about what it is to be christian. And I think thats what I am – it’s not about church every Sunday, but more about attitudes towards others and how you live your life to be the best that you can be (without being a sanctimonious bore). Amen to that I say.

  21. People took you serious? I thought it was funny. I laughed. It’s the same thing I would have said.

  22. Well, that’ll teach me to spend too much time working. I miss out on all the fun! I must admit, when I was new to your blog, you confused me a little with some of your “God” comments. But never did you scare me off or cause me to want to jump in and “save” you. I think it’s sad the “holy huddle” believes in isolating themselves from the rest of the world. That, for sure, is not biblical. Just ask Paul. There isn’t any separation between sacred and secular int his world. It all belongs to the Creator King. And regardless of what you cherry pick, believe fully or not at all, we’ll all find out whether we’re right or wrong about 1 second after we die! What a great give-and-take conversation this would make in person!

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