Daily Archives: September 6, 2010

Mama Don’t You Talk, I Mean Walk So Fast

On my way back from the pool this morning I saw the funniest thing. OK. Not exactly funny-funny — but definitely amusing.

Today is Labor Day. And many people have the day off. The mere fact that I was able to go for a swim, first thing in the morning with my kids at home, says holiday to me. (Dad was watching the kids. Yeah. Babysitting. Why in the world is it called “watching the kids” when dad’s doing it but when mom….oh wait. I digress. This topic is for another post. Where was I? Oh. Right. That amusing thing. Sorry!)

To get the full effect, I need to paint the scene. So. Close your eyes. Oh, wait. No. Don’t close your eyes. Then you won’t be able to read this. Hmmmm. OK. Sit back. Relax. Pretend you’re closing your eyes and picture this…..

A beautiful late summer day. The sun is shining. The sky is clear. The air smells fresh and clean. You’re driving through a picturesque subdivision with front porches (that people actually use) and sidewalks (that people actually use). Very Norman Rockwell, our neighborhood.

And in the distance you see a family. Walking. Mom is a few steps ahead, leading the way. Two little boys, about ages 5 and 8. The older boy is pushing the stroller and the dad is just behind them. You think, how sweet. A family walk. It’s so great that they’re all out exercising together. What a good example they’re providing their children. Ahhh, yes. The family that plays together, stays together.

Here. In case you’re imaginatively-impaired, I found a little visual aid.

Except, picture the big kid pushing the stroller. And remember, they’re in a neighborhood. With houses, not storefronts.  Mom first. Followed by the kids and stroller. Dad, a step behind. On a narrow sidewalk. And they’re wearing different clothes.  Oh, and it’s just some anonymous family because Dave Chappell and his brood? They don’t live near me.

But you get the idea.

As you get closer, you notice three things.

1. The boys have sour looks on their faces. (The baby in the stroller is perfectly content, however.)

2. Mom is talking on her cell phone.

3. Dad is texting.

Which leads you to #4.

4. No wonder the kids have sour looks on their faces.


Norman Rockwell would be rolling over in his grave.


Filed under family, funny, Observations