How To Increase Your Comments – Jane Style

(Many of you have asked me how it is I attract so many comments. Seriously? How long have you been reading my blog? I garner about half the comments most of you do. So, before you read the below tip sheet, I have to qualify. This post is tongue-in-cheek. It truly is. I know that many of you employ some of these tips with sincerity and passion. (How do you think I came up with this tip sheet?) And I’m jealous of you. Honestly, I am. This post is merely poking fun at myself and my own lack of passion/energy/discipline at honoring the comments that do come my way. For all of you who have been slighted by me in that regard, please know I am deeply sorry and acutely aware of my inadequacies. Now, on to the post….)

How To Increase Your Comments – Jane Style

10. Write all the comments yourself. As many as you like. Until your fingers bleed.

9. Comment after everyone else’s comment. Even if all they say is, “Great post!”

8. Let the spam through. After all, the spam was nice enough to spam you in the first place.

7. Beg and plead for comments. Ask oodles and oodles of questions for your readers to respond to. Even if the questions have absolutely nothing to do with your post.

6. Pray that God and all the angels will bring more comments to your blog.

5. Scream at the lurkers and guilt them into acknowledging their presence.

4. Promise prizes for comments.

3. Become a comment whore and indiscriminately leave comments on any blog you can find. Even if all the time you can spare is to say, “Great post!”

2. Make it easy for your readers to comment. Skip log-ins, CAPTCHA codes, registration forms and the required first-born son.

And the number one way to increase your comments?

1.

Sorry. I couldn’t come up with the number one answer. Yes. I am THAT comment-challenged.

Can you help? (Hey! I just employed tip #7! See? I’m learning!)

(All “Great post!” comments will not be deleted. So if that’s all you have to say? By all means, I’ll take it!)

30 Comments

Filed under Blogging

30 responses to “How To Increase Your Comments – Jane Style

  1. This is definitely funny. I thought comment whore was one who would do anything for a comment, not go around commenting indiscriminately. (I have another word for THAT.)

    I come to your blog because you always have something witty to say, something that makes me think or laugh, and usually provokes a response in me. And since you’ve (sometimes) responded to me, I can tell you are a genuinely nice person, and I feel more likely to WANT to have a conversation with you. So I come back for more and comment. (I’m NOT desperate. I’m not. I just sound that way.)

    And the question at the end of the post? Those bug me and if I leave a comment, I usually ignore it. I see it for what it is: a bid for comments. (And there, I just broke my own rule and answered your question. See what a comment sl*t I am?) 😉

  2. Um…I’ve never done #4 (and I only accidentally did #8 once!)…

    My name is Wendy, and I have a “Comment Problem”…

    Great post! LOL!

    Wendy

  3. You did the question thingy–you’re finally in the club! I always ask for embarrassing stories and am then depressed when nobody wants to air their dirty laundry. 🙂 Great Post!!!

  4. I think I agree with commenter #1…that I visit because you usually have something I can relate to, even though I don’t have kids, because you talk about a wide spectrum of things and do it in an entertaining, yet thought provoking way. I usually try to comment just so you know I came by, and because if I like your writing I think you should know. So. Great post!

  5. I have always wondered how some bloggers out there get so many comments. I was on a blog the other day that had like 350 comments. The post wasn’t even that great. I will admit to getting comment envy at times like that. I often get a couple of comments per post, but it is nowhere near the amount of vistors my blog gets, which I find interesting. I guess there are a lot of lurkers out there, which I tend to be sometimes too, so I guess it is a catch 22. There is no “magic formula” out there that I can see. If you find one, let us know!

  6. #3 makes me scratch my head. I probably spend 15 to 20 minutes a day peeking at different blogs (okay sometimes it’s much longer but that’s only when I’m procrastinating) and I’m amazed at how some people: (1) manage to find the time to respond to nearly EVERY single blog out there, and (2) actually have something they feel the need to respond with. A post has to either make me laugh hard enough for my husband to know that I’m not really working on lesson plans (I keep an extra window open on the laptop to hide WordPress when he walks by), or it has to make me think for me to even want to comment. I wonder if there’s a stat for the top three all time commenters? (That’s not a #7 by the way, just thinking out loud.)

    oh yeah, almost forgot, GREAT POST !

  7. Extra window open, extra tab – we’re blogging sisters! I do the exact same thing. Except I’m hiding my blogging addiction from my kids and my husband!

  8. Jayne

    Great post! 😉

  9. Carol

    Ditto what Jayne said!

  10. Very cute! I hate it when people receive a comment, click on the commenter’s blog and leave a totally fake comment, just to “prove” they’ve been there, or to return the comment favor. I don’t think bloggers have to do that (unless they are genuinely interested, of course). I’m not blogging right now, but when I was, I never left a comment expecting to recieve one on my own blog in return! I love your list, and enjoyed the comments so far. GREAT POST! 🙂

  11. I needed a chuckle today. Especially after replenishing the larder. I know you know what I mean. I’ll say no more. Except…

  12. Great post! (Why have 13 comments when you can have 14?) 😉

  13. unabridgedgirl

    Oh, I love you, Jane. 🙂

  14. I love 8 and 9. And I’m so now going to ask random questions from now on!

  15. Ummmm. Should I be ashamed? LOL. I say, whatever floats your boat, as long as it’s in good fun!

  16. Love this! After almost two years of blogging, I continue to be baffled by how the comment thing works. Guess writing a post on comments is a pretty good way to get some? 🙂

  17. Loved this post – we’re all comments sluts really……

  18. Comments on my blog are like crack to me. I never comment on blogs that have comments in the hundreds — I’m glad for the blogger, but clearly they don’t need my comment, and often they’re kind of embarrassingly sycophantic (I leave those kinds too, but only if there aren’t too many already) and I wonder how the blogger even has time to read them any more. If I read something that doesn’t have many or any comments, I’ll comment even if it’s not great because I remember being there. Considering how much I need constant external validation it’s amazing I didn’t start blogging years ago. Great post, Jane! You’re the best! I worship you! Oh wait, you already have lots of comments. Never mind. 🙂

  19. I’m guilty of #4. I did back in November for NaBloPoMo.

    Great Post!

  20. Jane

    Now there are some funny tips…for me it was IF YOU WRITE THEY WILL COMMENT…i always reply and i read others blogs…love blogging …for me its cathartic with my life and its happenings…But i did love your list….zman sends

  21. Great post!

    …..
    ………..
    …………….

    Heeheehee, seriously Jane, you’re amazing. These two were my favorite:
    “5. Scream at the lurkers and guilt them into acknowledging their presence.

    4. Promise prizes for comments.”

    Do I get a prize for this comment? 😛

  22. suzicate

    Do I get a prize if I say “great post”. You are funny. I wrote on the other day about blog obsession, but didn’t post it…figured I’d tick off too many people, actually I might post it anyway if I ever go back and finish it!

  23. This is great Jane. I come to your space because I don’t know what to expect. You’ve tackled serious subjects and humorous ones. But no matter what the content, you are always genuine and articulate.

    I can’t help myself – GREAT POST! (Since I capitolized all the letters does that make it a little different?)

  24. SO funny, Jane.
    I have nothing to offer you, though, for increasing comments. I know most people who comment on my posts are hoping I come read their blogs and comment. I don’t have the time or interest right now. So they go away and others come trolling for comments.
    So it seems reading and commenting (especially “good post”) gets you the same. I don’t read or comment, so my blog’s out of luck.
    Maybe I’ll employ tip #10. Since I’ve already read at least my own post. 😉

  25. You never seem to have a problem with comments! 😉

  26. Great post!

    LOL. Sorry. You left the door wide open yourself! 😉

    I HAVE pretended to be a male reader for a male fellow blogger whose wife complained that all his readers are women. LOL. It was done as a joke of course since I pretended to be Sidney Poitier…

    I am torn about this whole commenting thing… Sometimes I do enjoy a post a lot without anything else to say other than: I really enjoy reading this post. Or even just: LOL. When this happens, “To comment or not to comment” often becomes an inner struggle…

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