“Well, you know what they say: if you don’t have anything nice to say about anybody, come sit by me!”
One of my favorite lines from one of my favorite movies. And it’s my favorite for a reason.
Because it’s true for most of us, although, we’d never admit it.
I enjoy a good tidbit of gossip. I try not to spread any but I admit, my ears perk up when it’s being shared. Some people have a higher tolerance for it than others. I’d like to think that I know when to stop, know when to keep my thoughts to myself.
But I’m no saint. And there are not many on this Earth that can prove that they are. Saints, that is.
When friends, family or acquaintances are going through especially tough times, I zip it. Major and embarrassing faux pas? Ignored. I’ve been there. I’ve done that. I wouldn’t want my financial or relationship woes savored for entertainment.
But the “What? Not again?” annoyances that pop up? I’ve been known to share with my closest and dearest friends. I’m not proud of it. But apparently, I’m not too ashamed to stop. I call it “unloading” in order to assuage my guilt.
I reign it in when things get ugly or mean.
“There’s never an excuse to be mean” – wise words from my brother-in-law.
Words I try to live by.
Especially in the comment section of a blog post.
A mildly controversial topic that I blogged about months ago, suddenly became popular in the blogosphere. And one individual, who shall remain nameless, had much to say about my take and those of my readers. The comments to my other commenters were just plain mean. Not worth repeating. Not constructive. And frankly, not even argumentative. (Which I may have allowed, if only to encourage discussion.)
And then, after copying and pasting an admittedly, ill-constructed paragraph of mine, little Ms. Snark said:
“Oooooo. Well said. Kudos to you, Oh Great Writer.”
I enjoy a lively discussion. I am not of the ilk who feels if I don’t agree with you, I shouldn’t comment. I like differing opinions. Sharing a point of view that is different from my own is welcomed here. It’s one of the many ways that I grow as a human being.
But gratuitous snark and sarcasm?
That is not welcome here.
Or, anywhere for that matter.
(Yes. The Blogosphere police chief has spoken. Now, run along and comment somewhere else. Constructively. Kindly. And with no malice. You’ll feel much better about yourself afterwards. Trust me.)
13 responses to “There Are Times When You Need To Keep The Snark To Yourself”
I have to admit if I get nasty or sarcastic comments I just don’t publish them. Or I make a post out of them, like you’ve just done! 😀
I’m not a fan of gossip at all.
Well said. Kudos to you. You *are* a great writer.
And anyone who says that to you with nasty tone and overuse of Os deserves a quick delete.
Don’t lose any sleep over it, Jane. Some people just feel small and need to make themselves feel bigger. The rest of us? Would rather help make *you* bigger.
Annnnnd, Christine pretty much has the perfect perspective on this. I don’t think I can say it any better, so I’ll leave you with a big old “Ditto!”.
Ditto to the ditto!
Having a food blog is safer…when you write, you share, and its always a risk. Rude people stink, mean people stink more.
You know you’ve made it when you get your first Troll. 🙂 Shake it off, baby. You’re awesome.
Some people are so uncomfortable with themselves, they have a need to share it. “If I am miserable, you should be too”. Sad. Very sad. Not worth stressing about – another of those more easily said than done things, I know.
I’m pretty much a closet snark. Except when I am in the car by myself and then I let the snarky remarks fly…out loud. I don’t really mind snarky remarks on my blog. But what I do mind is a condescending remark that suggests I have no idea about the issue at hand. There are tons of things I don’t know, but I write only about the things I do know. And I clearly indicate when my words are purely my own opinions on the subject.
I figure that unless you are being paid then your blog is your own. Other people can take it or leave it. I choose to take yours because I always find it interesting.
Oh, the dreaded trolls. I delete the troll’s sarcastic comments. There is no need to be rude to fellow bloggers. You are a great writer and I thoroughly enjoy your blog! 🙂
There’s a fine line between funny/sarcastic and downright mean. I don’t understand why people (online) feel free to be their worst (snarkiest) selves. But there’s plenty of it around.
And I agree. You’re a fabulous (and funny!) writer.
Hey, look at the up-side. It strikes me that if you have a troll then you’ve ‘arrived’. Something you say, do, or are perceived to be has probably made this person feel deeply inadequate (again). Their trolling campaign is their attempt to make you feel as bad as they do. Ignoring them is actually the best policy. To quote Coco Chanel: “I don’t care what you think about me. I don’t think about you at all.”
That sucks…but I’m glad you called her out!
Sounds like you had the same mean commenter that Kathy up north in the UP had…