As I mentioned before I lived my childhood in Michigan. I was born in Detroit. The Motor City. Henry Ford. Birth of the mass-produced, assembly line automobile. Cars, cars and more cars. Traffic there exists, sure. But the lights are timed. When I was a kid I remember traveling down 8 mile road going miles and miles without ever being stopped by a traffic light. Timed traffic signals allow for an easy flow of traffic. Less accidents. Better gas mileage. Happier drivers.
You people in the south need to catch up already! I moved here 25 years ago and noticed that you hadn’t picked up on this useful bit of technology. Since your fashion sense was about 10 years behind I figured it may take a while to catch up with the north. Then I find out from other transplants that your northern towns didn’t utilize timed traffic signals yet, either. What? Are you kidding me? This wasn’t a North vs. South kind of thing? Detroit has been on to something and it hasn’t caught on nationwide? No wonder that poor state is in the mess that it’s in. It can’t even market something as ingenious as timed traffic signals.
Stop. Go. Stop. Go. Stop. Go. Stop. Go. That was my day today, running errands. Stop at a red light. Go 100 yards. Stop at another traffic light. Go 100 yards. Stop again. And on and on it goes. Ridiculous! It can’t be that hard to time the traffic signals. But since it is…I’m going back to bed. I don’t need this today.
A straight line. No detours. No stopping at “Go” to collect $200 (although, that does sound kinda nice.) I just want to walk a straight line. Go from point A to point B. And be done. Finished with whatever it is I want to accomplish.
Moms don’t walk in straight lines. We have to step off the track. Kiss a boo-boo. Fix breakfast. Throw that load of laundry in. Take the dog out. Break up another WWF-worthy wrestling match.
I woke up this morning positively energized. How? I don’t know; because I was up until 1am reading all of YOUR wonderful blogs. But this morning I had ideas for posts just bursting to get on “paper.” (What do you young kids call it these days? On screen?) I’m in the shower just hoping I’ll remember all of these fabulous ideas long enough to get them jotted down in a rough form. I must have had a weeks worth spilling forth. Amazing posts that would undoubtedly change YOUR life (yes, I’m speaking to you, sitting there in your pj’s, sipping coffee and sneaking the last of the Oreos) FOREVER! Then son#2 came into the bathroom, “Mom? If I could be a real superhero… I mean really be one…can I do it for a job someday?” Sure sweetie, you can be anything you want to be. Now go watch TV with your brother. I’m trying to get ready for the day.
I step out of the shower, walk to my closet and the cat has left me a lovely gift. Hairball mixed with regurgitated Meow Mix. Lovely. Clean that up. Wash hands. Dry hair. Skip make-up because I can still remember about 6 of those FABULOUS post ideas. “Mom!!!” Yes? “Can we play Xbox? It’s raining out!” Son #1 has already anticipated my typical response of “Go play outside.” Yes, you can play Xbox. Good! That’ll give me at least a half an hour to jot down ideas.
The phone rings. My husband, sweet man that he is, heard something on the radio on his way to work that reminded him of me and wants to share. Blah, blah, blah. Unload dishwasher while I listen and see that I forgot to put the load from the washer to the dryer last night. Do that, too. Hang up. Remember that I need to strip the beds. While stuffing sheets into the washer I remember that I had all these good ideas for a post today. What were they again? One. Ok. Two. Uh-huh. What was three again? No idea.
Ok. Upstairs to the computer. Turn it on. Two ideas out of seven, not bad. Just hurry up and boot up so I can write (type?) you down. “Mom!!!!!” #1son screams from downstairs. “It’s lightening out. Do we have to shut off Xbox?” Yes. And I have to shut down slow dinosaur of a computer. Set the good example and all of that.
Sigh. So now, it’s two hours later and I’ve got NADA. Nothing. Zip. Zilch.
The shortest distance between two points is a line. I just want to walk a straight line sometimes.