Awwww, Google! You Remembered!

I clicked on Google to google something, of course. I’m an old Googler from way back. One of my favorite pastimes. My kids say my epitaph is going to read, “Let’s Google it!”

But I digress….

So, I click on Google and what do I see?

This….

So cute! Cakes and cupcakes. Sparklers and candles. I just adore the Google pictures each day. It’s my second favorite pastime, besides actual Googling, of course. I hover over the picture and discover something new and an hour is lost learning about C. V. Raman or Maria Callas or the invention of soap. (Here I go. Digressing again. Must be my age. Wink, wink.)

Today, I see the cakes and the candle and wonder, “Who else shares my birthday today?”

I hover the mouse over the picture and low and behold it says:

Happy Birthday, Jane!

My heart skips a beat. Google remembered!

I’m so touched. And honored. And awestruck.

And then, I realize (fairly quickly, because I’m not that egocentric) that the image will only be seen by me.

But that’s okay.

Google remembered my birthday.

That’s enough for me.

Google It. A Blogger’s Best Friend.

I’ve tried other search engines, but quite honestly, Google is my best friend.

He’s always there for me. With information, with a laugh, with the unexpected.

And I absolutely love the suggestions it creates with each of my Google searches. Most of the time.

I TiVo most of my television. I love the convenience of watching when I want to watch, on my comfy couch, on my fancy (for us, anyway) television screen. I was watching the last episode of the season of Detroit 1-8-7 (I’m addicted to cop shows) and decided to “Google it!” to learn more about the program and when it might start up again. Imagine my surprise as I’m typing in the title of the show and one of the suggestions is “Detroit 1-8-7 cancelled.” No, not surprise. I was officially ticked.(Who are these people at Nielsen, anyway?) But thanks to Google, I can write the futile letters to the powers that be and begin mourning the inevitable.

I also love the clever visuals they provide, celebrating the holiday du jour. Like this one for the 119th anniversary of the first documented ice cream sundae. Yum!

Or more recently, Earth Day….

When I’m lost for a blog topic (like today) I will often “Google it!” with “it” being anything. I’ll just start typing letters and see what Google suggests I write about. Sometimes the suggestions will jog a memory or remind me of something that really irks me or make me want to research something I’d never considered before. Like warcraft ( I still don’t get it) or study island (my kind of place – yes, I am and always will be a nerd) or chocolate rain (a viral video on YouTube that reminded me of another post I want to write. Hey! Two for one!)

I’ve even googled “Google it!” and found these clever sites:  Just (blanking) Google It and Here, Let Me Google That For You. (Oh, how I wish I had thought of these first.)

Google is my friend. My best friend when I have a bit of writer’s block. Or some extra time on my hands. Or when procrastination is more fun than productivity. But then, when isn’t procrastination fun?

That’s my secret. And I’m sharing it with you, dear readers. It’s the kind of blogger I am. Little Miss Share My Best Kept Secrets. 

Wait, you say I’ve shared this before? This is a secret re-run?

Uh-oh.

Oh, and you don’t think this is much of a secret? Every blogger knows this. Well, aren’t we all la-ti-da?

Hmmmmm….

Guess my next google should be “original blog topics.”

Wrinkled Boobs, Lucky Charms Cakes And Helping You To Spell Flummoxed – Guess I’m Just A Wealth Of Information

(Ok, we’re back. But I’m buried in laundry and sand and fast food wrappers. While I’m cleaning up and getting ready for my children’s first day of school (gasp!) I have another re-run for you. Enjoy!)

This probably only interests me. So I apologize in advance if I’m boring you. And there is so much great stuff out there, you could go somewhere else. I’m just sayin’.

I receive the most amusing search terms to find my blog. I really, really do. They make me laugh. And they make for nice, light material after two really depressing posts.

spell “flummoxed” – I guess once a teacher, always a teacher. I’m just glad someone was able to come here, read a little something fun and get ed-u-ma-cated all in one shot. (Now, the insecure me is racing back to said post, making sure I didn’t misspell flummoxed.)

husband online all day – I have no idea which post this would have generated and I want to assure all of you out there my husband is NOT addicted to the internet. End of story. Now stop asking.

jane is sleeping – Again, no idea how my blog popped up for that search. ‘Cause I have little kids. And a night owl teenager. Sleep is a luxury in this house. I wish Jane were sleeping.

wrinkled hanging boobs – Enough already!

chipped my front tooth on a staple – Ok. That really happened. And I wrote about it here. But I had it fixed so I’m cleverly disguised. You might not even recognized me if you saw me out and about in Blog World. I’m just relieved that I’m not the only one who’s done it.

hornyteens – Typed just like that. No space. All together now! And a-one-and-a-two-and-a three….Whaaaaaa? Searching for horny teens and you found me? First of all that was a long, long time ago. Second, if you’re talking about my teaching years – yes, I taught many the horny teen but I’m sure I didn’t blog about them. That’s just gross. Third, ewwwwwwww.

my favorite babysitter 10, blue – ? That’s all I got – ?

alleluia bon jovi – Now, I hate to break it to you Bon Jovi fans out there – because I know you all hang on my every music recommendation – but I’m not a huge fan of Bon Jovi. So I’m sure I’ve never written about them here. Or anywhere, for that matter. Especially with alleluia immediately preceding the name. How did that happen?

my husband sucks the joy out of life – There we go again with the husband bashing. I don’t bash my husband here! That’s for this blog. (Incidentally, a funny blog for when a particular someone is driving you crazy.) And my husband never sucks the joy out of life. (fingers and toes crossed, biting back a big guffaw)

lucky charms cake – Sounds interesting. I’m intrigued. But you landed here? Sounds more like something my good friend TKW would cook up!

what does a woman 120 pounds 5 ’5 look like – Come a little closer, honey, and I’ll show you. (wink, wink) But seriously, Buddy. Every woman in those crazy chat rooms you hang out in says she’s 5’5″ and 120 lbs. You need to turn off the computer, quit sucking the joy out of life and get out there and meet REAL people. Seriously, dude.

do boobs get wrinkled – Apparently, YES. But I can only answer in the affirmative based on the number of times other people search about wrinkled boobs and ended up here. I’m just left wondering how it is so many of you out there have seen me naked?

Don’t forget! Write your post about blogging to help me celebrate my one year in Blog World. We’ll all meet back here in 4 days (August 13) to link, learn and maybe have a few laughs!

It’s Share Your Crazy Search Engine Terms Day!

The day you’ve all been waiting for! I’ve had some doozies. And many of them I have NO idea how they led poor souls to MY blog. Without further ado, here are mine. I can’t wait to hear yours!

This all started when I came across a search term that led someone to my blog, “Wrinkled Boobs.” Are you kidding me? Who searches for wrinkled boobs? And since that post here are some variations that have led people here: wrinked bobbs, wringled boobs, boobs right, boobs left. Boobs left and right? Seriously, there are a lot of boobs people out there that are obsessed with boobs.

turtle poop – I know exactly which post they were directed to: here. But what baffles me is why anyone would Google turtle poop.

Hey, I’m going away but I got something – Huh? This has got to be lyrics to a song or something.

(my daughter’s nickname which is fairly unique) – And it freaked me out. Her nickname is VERY unique and I found out it was attached to a photo I used of her which I quickly renamed.

dirty mom son – – Ewwwwww. Just Ewwwwww.

mom getting dirty with son and girlfriend – Double ewwwww!

kids clack – Huh? Just huh?

dirty fat moms – Hey! Who you callin’ fat, Willis?

top ten reasons you might be a jedi redneck – Someone actually knows that it’s possible and then even cares about being a jedi redneck. That astounds me.

Ok. So let’s hear yours. You can leave it in the comment section here OR if you’ve written a post on it as well, make sure you link it in the comment section so we can all take a look. Thanks for playing!

(We just found out my daughter’s team has a very good chance of advancing to finals in the State Championships. If that happens I won’t be able to check in with you all until sometime Saturday. I’ll miss you all but can’t wait to read what you’ve come up with! See you soon and wish us luck!)

What To Do When You’re At A Loss For Words? Play Around With Google, Of Course!

I was in the habit of writing posts when the mood struck (which was often) and then scheduling them to be posted. I was getting so ahead of myself my body had a hard time keeping up with my brain. My brain was already wearing tomorrow’s outfit and my body was taking off my shoes from the day before. Posts were just spilling out of my head and onto the keyboard. I was more than a week ahead of myself.

Until now.

 I just realized I had nothin’. Not a thing scheduled for tomorrow.

The little angel on my right shoulder said, “Come on, now. You can do it. Just cozy up to the keyboard and write. You have so many wonderful things to say.”

The little devil on my left shoulder said, “Awwww, skip it. Who really looks in on you daily, anyway? Just those weirdos searching for moms doin’ dirty things. Go downstairs, open up the Halloween candy a little early (ok, it’s already open…you caught me) and watch one of the 100 shows you have TiVo’d.”

The little angel on the right shoulder said, “No. Your public awaits. They’ll be so sad to have to look at yesterday’s post all over again. You MUST add something new!”

The little devil on the left shoulder said, “Mmmmmm…some chocolate sure sounds good right about now.”

Guess who won?

Hey! Ye of little faith….read on.

For inspiration I decided to Google “top ten reasons for….,” just for kicks and giggles, to see what comes up. Among the suggestions were “Top ten reasons for divorce” Intriguing. So I clicked it. There were 2, 360, ooo hits. Quite a lot of people pondering that issue. I decided to investigate other reasons for top ten lists. Below are the rest of my findings.

Top Ten Reasons Sarah Palin Resigned – 164,000,000. That’s million. Are you kidding me? I had no idea that many people cared.

Top Ten Reasons to Date a Wrestler – only 272,000 results. I betcha I can think of #272,001.

Top Ten Reasons for Getting Fired – over 1,000,000 results. There are articles on the reasons, the causes. There’s even articles on warning signs. Thank God I’m a SAHM. Job security is lookin’ pretty great right about now.

Top Ten Reasons You Might Be A Jedi Redneck – Really. I can’t make this up. Approximately 2,950 hits for this search. Now, I know Jedis. (My husband is a big Star Wars fan) And I know rednecks. (I live in the southern United States). But how do the twain meet? How, I ask you?

Top Ten Reasons I Procrastinate – Only 102,000 hits there. Come. On. Now! Procrastination is an art form, carefully crafted by many. Only 102,000 hits? We got a lot of people in denial out there, and I ain’t talkin’ about a swim down a famous river.

Top Ten Reasons Against Evolution – First of all, against? Like it’s a choice? Ok, so the number of results? 2, 960,000. Almost 3 million.

Top Ten Reasons for Bathing – Only 177,000. I thought I smelled something funny.

Top Ten Reasons Couples Fight – There were 2, 540,000 results for that. I bet my husband and I could add a few more.

Top Ten Reasons Gay Marriage Is Wrong – Another 2 million plus results. Someone tell me why we’re spending any time on this issue? Really? Behind closed doors. Consenting adults. Doesn’t affect my taxes. Two people love each other. Oooooooooo. Scary.

Top Ten Reasons Men Are Better Than Women – 3, 220,000 results. And the Top Ten Reasons Women Are Better Than Men? 29, 400,000. Let me say that again, gentlemen. Twenty nine million, four hundred thousand. Somebody’s got some catching up to do!

Top Ten Reasons Not to Get a Toller – What the heck is a toller? There were only 4,040 hits. So I’m not the only one who is in the dark on that one.

Top Ten Reasons to Vote Democrat –  There were 2, 010,000 results.  But only 1.4 million hits to vote republican. Hmmmmm.

Top Ten Reasons Why I Love You – 45,000,000. But that must be a typo. Surely there are more hits out there? Because love is what makes the world go round. And I just want to shout out to all of you out there,  I LOVE YOU! (You’re the best. You really are. Now, go hug someone.)