When Jane Wishes Upon A Star

(To celebrate her high school graduation, my daughter and I are on a little hiatus together. A mother/daughter hiatus. I will be posting some of my favorite posts in the interim. Enjoy!)

I wish I had all the time to read every blog I want to read, with plenty of time to make deep, thoughtful comments and the time to write amazing posts of my own.

I wish I hadn’t have spent $75 on a massage that was just so-so from someone fresh out of massage school. I thought I was saving money.  But it was so not worth it.

I wish I didn’t use the word “so” so much. (Whoops! I did it again, Brittany!)

I wish I could turn back time and snuggle my babies when they were babies again.

I wish the mess in the Gulf had never happened and I worry about all the wildlife choking on the filth.

I wish more than a fifth of all Americans, such as, COULD locate, like Iraq and South Africa such as everywhere like, the United States on a map. (I’m sorry to make fun of her again. But it is still funny.)

I wish whenever I was stuck for a blog post idea the writing prompts I look up actually inspired me.

I wish I had a pa-pa-pa-poker face.

I wish all the food that tastes so good had the negative calories of celery.

I wish Diet Coke didn’t taste like….Diet.

I wish every blogger out there (especially the ones who read my humble blog) lots of traffic and lots of fabulous post ideas.

I wish I could win the lottery. Of course, I suppose I should at least play the lottery first. (Which I’ve never done. Ever. Can you believe it?)

I wish I knew what my writing gift was. I wish I could decide what I do best and run with it.

I wish everyone out there a happy, happy Memorial Day. I wish everyone protecting our freedom and the freedom of others a safe arrival home. And if you’re missing someone who has died I wish you peace in your heart.

Recipe For The No-Fail Blog Post

Preheat home to a comfortable 68 degrees.

Ingredients

1 caramel macchiato from Starbucks

1 small notebook

favorite Mickey Mouse pen

10 nimble fingers

1 keyboard and computer (preferably connected together as a unit)

1 comfy chair in a room void of distraction

Directions

1. Sit down in comfy chair and sip the foam off your caramel macchiato while the computer boots up. Once your home page is ready, scan the headlines for ideas. Jot down the plethora of ideas that begin filling your head. Flip through the pages of your notebook for all of the cryptic messages you’ve left yourself. Wonder what in the world you were thinking.

2. In your overloaded brain, combine headlines, pictures and cryptic notebook messages. Mix well. Sit back and sip coffee until a clear idea rises to the top.

3. Once a clear idea has taken shape, take nimble fingers and type clear idea until a blog post begins to form. If needed, shake head in disbelief that you finally have something to say.

4. After your draft is finished, cover and let simmer for the time it takes for a quick potty break. Uncover and review post.

5. Score post with revisions. Add humor, if necessary.

6. Use spellcheck and wish you could remember how to reinstate grammar check. Kick self for getting angry with grammar check and disabling it.

7. Debate whether to comb the internet for pictures to illustrate your No-Fail Post. Realize you have no idea what the perfect picture would be and give up.

8. Press publish.

And voila! You have the perfect recipe for the No-Fail Blog Post!

Enjoy!