Tag Archives: teenagers

Spotting Signs Of The Ever Elusive Teenager

If you have a teenager in your home (or you think you do) you know what I’m talking about….

After a long, hard day you clean the kitchen after dinner. The dishwasher is humming. The leftovers are safely tucked away in the refrigerator. The counters shine and the sink sparkles. Passing through the kitchen on your way to bed you smile and admire your handy work. And then, you wake up in the morning and you find this…

Or, after dropping your two youngest off at school and running errands all morning you come back to the house, hoping to enjoy a few minutes of peace before school is out and a whole new set of chores will be begging your attention. And you find this blocking your way…

And then, of course, there are the times when you find little notes like this one on your kitchen table…

 

Yep. That’s when you know you have a teenager in the house. And I wouldn’t want it any other way!

Meet my elusive teen! She’s my !!! for this week!

For more !!! visit Momalom or Bad Mommy Moments.

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Filed under The !!!

Gimme Chemicals! I Have A Teenager!

Need I say more?

And the sad things is, she’s an awesome teenager. (Knocking on everything wood in sight) We’ve had a few, a tiny few troublesome incidents with her. So few, in fact, that I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Why is it sad that she’s an awesome teenager? Because I’m beginning to realize that there are parents out there who are way more stressed than I am. And I can’t imagine going through more.

My troubles include:

  • an A-B student, taking Advanced Placement and honors courses, who is perfectly fine with getting C’s if she doesn’t like the teacher, the assignment, her seat next to the door, or  the temperature outside that day.
  • a teen who chooses high school football games, dances and other activities over studying for exams next week
  • a child who has to be reminded and reminded and reminded to do the few chores we ask her to do
  • a senior in high school who knows she’s going to college but doesn’t want to actively participate in the process. She tosses all brochures into the circular file, with her mind already made up to go to the easiest state school that’ll take her.
  • a spendthrift who never budgets for gas for the car she uses or lunch at school. When I hand over her allowance that is supposed to cover more than one item, she blows it in one day at the mall – and no, her purchases don’t include anything she needed in the first place.

I know. Pull out your violins. Cry me a river. I have it so tough.

But I’m stuck. How in the world do you teach responsibility, dedication, discipline? At her age I was the one applying to schools, begging my parents to consider the school of my choice – with them shaking their head no, and telling me I would go to the university right next door. I just want for her what I couldn’t have at her age. But she doesn’t seem to want more.

I want her to want more. So how do you teach ambition or drive? How do you push without pushing too hard?

On the other hand:

  • You tell her to be ready by a certain time? She’s rarely (if ever) late. Punctual to a fault.
  • You ask her to help you with something? I can count on one hand how many times she’s given me attitude. She is almost always willing to chip in – well, that is, if it isn’t already on her chore list.
  • As much as we’ve been at odds she hates leaving the house or going to bed at night without us resolving the conflict. I hate to admit it, but she’s usually the one that makes me talk it out with her until we can hug…and mean it.
  • When her money just flies out of her purse, it’s often to buy something for someone else. She is very, very generous.
  • She still wants to spend time with us. Whether it’s to watch Masterpiece Theater with me, go out for sushi with her dad, take the boys to the park or out for ice cream or a family hike – she is eager to go and will switch her schedule to make time for us.

But some days. Some nights. I’ve had it with the struggle of the week. And you parents with more struggles than mine? You need this song more than I do. So crank it up. Shake your head. And scream it so the neighbors hear! (Well, maybe not that loud. Wouldn’t want a visit from the men in white now would we?)

Disclaimer: I have no idea what kind of chemicals The Pink Spiders are speaking of. The chemicals I crave come in red and white Coca Cola cans, Ben & Jerry’s ice cream tubs and those brown and yellow packages carrying plain and peanut m&m’s. THOSE kind of chemicals.

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Filed under Music, parenting

Some Things I Will Never Understand

1. With good and food. Why don’t they rhyme? Gud fud or gewwwd fewwwd. They should rhyme, doggone it.  

2. A cap on the oil spill. They didn’t think of that, oh say, on April 21st?

3. Why hasn’t time travel been invented yet? It’s way past 1984. Heck, we’re almost ten years past the year 2001. C’mon people! Get a move on! Get it? Move on? (I crack myself up.)

4. Why is it that re-tracing my steps jogs my memory like nothing else. I’m not kidding. I can find anything, remember anything, solve half the world’s problems if I just take the time to re-trace my steps.

5. My teenage daughter. ‘Nuff said.

6. Apparently, after extensive research, scientists have concluded that the chicken came before the egg. Who decided this was a worthy project and who funded it?

7. With caller id – do I say, “Hello Joe!” or do I say, “Hello?” as if I don’t know Joe is calling? Seriously. This keeps me up at night.

8. I just don’t get it. I invent things all the time but when I finally Google it, to make sure I’m the first, someone has always beat me to the patent? Always. As in, every single time.

9. Twitter and asymmetrical haircuts. They still puzzle me. Still.

10.  How is it no one has seen the extreme similarities between Madonna and Lady Gaga? Oh. Yeah. Because of what my 13-year-old niece said: “Who is Madonna?” (Oh. Wait. Someone has noticed it. And the mash-up video below is fantastic!)

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Filed under Completely Random

May You Rest In Peace, Sweet Boy

This is not supposed to happen to MY baby girl. This happens to you other mothers out there. Not that I wish it on you. Of course not. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone. But I’m just as bad as you teenagers out there. Thinking you’re invincible. Thinking that you’re so grown up. Thinking life won’t throw you devastating curve balls.

A sweet, kind, funny, adorable soul left this earth tonight and he was just 17. A senior in high school. His whole life ahead of him. And my daughter loved him. With all her heart. Her first “true love.”

I’m shocked. This CAN’T be happening. This happens in the movies. On TV. To other people. Not me. How do you help your daughter through something like this? I want to fix it. Rewind the tape. Stop all this from happening. Why? Why? Why?

I’m angry. How dare you take a piece of my daughter’s heart and then steal it away, never to give it back? How dare you treat your life so carelessly? Life is a precious gift. You threw your life back at God’s face. My daughter will never get to say goodbye, tell you how much she loved you ever again.

I’m scared. I want my daughter even closer now. Why do our children have to grow away from us? Make decisions that are risky, wrong, damaging? Why can’t we keep them close? Help them with EVERY stage? Keep them from every harm. Ward off danger. Wrap them in bubble wrap. Hold their tender hands always.

Go. Right now. Kiss your children. Tell them you love them. I don’t care what age they are. I don’t care if they pull away from you ’cause they’re at that embarrassed stage. You squeeze them. You hold them. You guide them. You play with them. Each minute with them is a precious gift. Don’t you ever forget that.

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Filed under Roadblocks