Tag Archives: wrinkled boobs

Wrinkled Boobs, Lucky Charms Cakes And Helping You To Spell Flummoxed – Guess I’m Just A Wealth Of Information

(Ok, we’re back. But I’m buried in laundry and sand and fast food wrappers. While I’m cleaning up and getting ready for my children’s first day of school (gasp!) I have another re-run for you. Enjoy!)

This probably only interests me. So I apologize in advance if I’m boring you. And there is so much great stuff out there, you could go somewhere else. I’m just sayin’.

I receive the most amusing search terms to find my blog. I really, really do. They make me laugh. And they make for nice, light material after two really depressing posts.

spell “flummoxed” – I guess once a teacher, always a teacher. I’m just glad someone was able to come here, read a little something fun and get ed-u-ma-cated all in one shot. (Now, the insecure me is racing back to said post, making sure I didn’t misspell flummoxed.)

husband online all day – I have no idea which post this would have generated and I want to assure all of you out there my husband is NOT addicted to the internet. End of story. Now stop asking.

jane is sleeping – Again, no idea how my blog popped up for that search. ‘Cause I have little kids. And a night owl teenager. Sleep is a luxury in this house. I wish Jane were sleeping.

wrinkled hanging boobs – Enough already!

chipped my front tooth on a staple – Ok. That really happened. And I wrote about it here. But I had it fixed so I’m cleverly disguised. You might not even recognized me if you saw me out and about in Blog World. I’m just relieved that I’m not the only one who’s done it.

hornyteens – Typed just like that. No space. All together now! And a-one-and-a-two-and-a three….Whaaaaaa? Searching for horny teens and you found me? First of all that was a long, long time ago. Second, if you’re talking about my teaching years – yes, I taught many the horny teen but I’m sure I didn’t blog about them. That’s just gross. Third, ewwwwwwww.

my favorite babysitter 10, blue – ? That’s all I got – ?

alleluia bon jovi – Now, I hate to break it to you Bon Jovi fans out there – because I know you all hang on my every music recommendation – but I’m not a huge fan of Bon Jovi. So I’m sure I’ve never written about them here. Or anywhere, for that matter. Especially with alleluia immediately preceding the name. How did that happen?

my husband sucks the joy out of life – There we go again with the husband bashing. I don’t bash my husband here! That’s for this blog. (Incidentally, a funny blog for when a particular someone is driving you crazy.) And my husband never sucks the joy out of life. (fingers and toes crossed, biting back a big guffaw)

lucky charms cake – Sounds interesting. I’m intrigued. But you landed here? Sounds more like something my good friend TKW would cook up!

what does a woman 120 pounds 5 ’5 look like – Come a little closer, honey, and I’ll show you. (wink, wink) But seriously, Buddy. Every woman in those crazy chat rooms you hang out in says she’s 5’5″ and 120 lbs. You need to turn off the computer, quit sucking the joy out of life and get out there and meet REAL people. Seriously, dude.

do boobs get wrinkled – Apparently, YES. But I can only answer in the affirmative based on the number of times other people search about wrinkled boobs and ended up here. I’m just left wondering how it is so many of you out there have seen me naked?

Don’t forget! Write your post about blogging to help me celebrate my one year in Blog World. We’ll all meet back here in 4 days (August 13) to link, learn and maybe have a few laughs!

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Filed under Completely Random, funny

Year In Review 2009 – Man, Am I Outta Touch!

I am continually amazed at the search terms that bring people to my blog. Some of the latest include:

  • is Ralph Lauren looking for models: Boy, not only do you like me you think I’m pretty, too!
  • moose turd cookies: Hey! My cooking isn’t THAT bad!
  • brazilian skin colour politically correct: Politically correct skin colour? Huh?
  • wrinkled boobs: Yes. Still. Almost every day
  • boobs search here: I wondered that every day throughout puberty
  • dirty mom son: Searched for and sent here more often than I’d like
  • gorgeous young girls: Now that’s better. Hey. Wait…….ewwwwww.

Yahoo is doing its year in review. They have many categories but the one that interested me? Top 10 Searches for 2009.

  1. Michael Jackson – Yes, his death was tragic. Yes, he was loved worldwide. Yes, much of his entertaining was genius. Yes, I had all of the Jackson 5’s albums as a kid. But I was so over him once he became physically  unrecognizable. The man had issues (on many levels) and all close to him should feel horrible that they didn’t do more to help him.
  2. The Twilight Saga – I don’t get it. My daughter does. She loved the series. She went to the 12:01am showing when the movie premiered. I tried reading the first novel but got bored. I see the appeal for teens. I just don’t get the appeal of women my age drooling over a teen vampire. We’d be disgusted if the genders were reversed.
  3. WWE – Seriously? People still watch that stuff?
  4. Megan Fox – I still couldn’t pick her out in a line-up.
  5. Britney Spears – A pop sensation, yes. And continues to be popular. She’s been on Yahoo’s Top 10 Search list for the past 5 years. My guess is the searches are by voyeurs relishing in the latest news of her twisted, messed up private life, not for her entertainment skills. And that’s just sad.
  6. Naruto Manga – An exotic Asian dish? A helpful Japanese phrase? Nope. Evidently it’s an anime series on Cartoon Network. Never seen it.
  7. American Idol – This I’ve heard of. And I’m an unashamed fan of the show. I find it fascinating. I wish this show had been around when I was in my twenties.
  8. Kim Kardashian – I just had to click back to the site to make sure I was spelling her name correctly. She has sisters, too, right? And they have a reality TV show? (I’m testing my knowledge here, so give me a sec.) Yep. I was right. But have I ever seen the show? Never.
  9. NASCAR – Again, really? People still watch this stuff?
  10. Runescape – Ok. It’s sci- fi, right? (Just guessing from the name) Yes. It’s the most popular free online role-playing game in the world according to the Guinness Book of World Records. And I’ve never heard of it.

Man.

I am officially old.

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Filed under Observations