Tunes for Tuesday – American Tune

I am feeling so melancholy.  Sometimes I play upbeat, crazy, happy songs to lift me out of a funk. Then other times, I listen to the songs the mimic the mood I’m in, honoring and celebrating the fact that I’m human. This is one of those songs.

“Many’s the time I’ve been mistaken
And many times confused” – I wish sometimes that I wasn’t the Pollyanna that I am. When people are cruel or unkind, I just don’t get it. What propels you to that level? What satisfaction can anyone possibly get from being unkind?

“Yes, and I’ve often felt forsaken
And certainly misused” – I trust too much. I believe everyone comes from the place that I come from – sunshine and roses. And then I’m horribly disappointed. Over and over. I never seem to learn.

“Oh, but I’m all right, I’m all right
I’m just weary to my bones” – And it’s true. I get over it. But I still never seem to learn. And it wears me down. So I start to mistrust or use more caution. And I don’t like the person I become. So I shake it off and start all over.

“And I don’t know a soul who’s not been battered
I don’t have a friend who feels at ease” – I know I’m not alone. But I still feel that way. Alone. Not a fun place to be.

“I don’t know a dream that’s not been shattered
or driven to its knees
but it’s all right, it’s all right
for we lived so well so long” – And I know we all get out of our funk. And the struggles we were dealing with seem so far away when we look back on them. We just need to be reminded. So today, I’m reminding myself how far I’ve come. My life may not be the picture perfect scripted utopia I wanted – and that’s ok.

“Still, when I think of the
road we’re traveling on
I wonder what’s gone wrong
I can’t help it, I wonder what’s gone wrong” – But that doesn’t mean I don’t have regret. I wish I could be one of those people who don’t think twice. Moves on so easily. That’s not me. I second guess. I kick myself. I think if only I had done (fill in the blank). I’d like to think that I live without regret and because I don’t wallow in my past transgressions I suppose I do an ok job of it. But that doesn’t mean I don’t envy those who seem detached from the past.

“Oh, and it’s alright, it’s all right, it’s all right
You can’t be forever blessed
Still, tomorrow’s going to be another working day
And I’m trying to get some rest” – So you go to bed and wake up to a new day. A long time ago, another lifetime ago, I was married. And unhappy. And someone suggested I might be depressed. I said “No. I wake every day in such a good mood. I’m not depressed.” What I didn’t say was “Oh. You might be right. I’m so exhausted by 3pm and all I want to do is sleep. And everything at the end of the day makes me cry.” But I struggled through. And moved on. And each day got a little easier. That’s all we can hope for.


Filed under Music

20 responses to “Tunes for Tuesday – American Tune

  1. angelcel

    Oh gosh, I read this and I recognise so much of it. If you and I lived close by I like to think that we’d become good friends, by virtue of the fact that we seem so similar. The kind of friendship where there is occasionally just companionable silence, quiet reflection and a hug but no words needed.

  2. Steven Harris

    I love Paul Simon. I think he is America’s greatest living songwriter (not Bobby Dylan). Hope his words and music are helping you feel a bit better. Forget the unkind people and remember those who love you for who you are. x

    • I know. Paul Simon is one of my absolute favorite singer/songwriters. So many of his songs resonate with me at various stages of my life. Stay tuned for one of my favorite songs by him that I always play around my birthday — in just a few weeks!

      • Steven Harris

        Not sure which my favourite would be if I had to choose. ‘America’ always moves me. ‘The Dangling Conversation’. ‘Leaves That Are Green’. ‘Me and Julio…’ Oh nope, I cannot choose. Want to go and listen to Gracelands now.

  3. It’s true, there’s a lotta jerkwads out there. But you are not one of them 🙂

  4. submom

    Jane, you read my mind. I was just looking at vid clips yesterday of Paul Simon hosting SNL where he (was) dressed up in a turkey suit singing “Still Crazy After All These Years”.

    In all seriousness, “And each day got a little easier. That’s all we can hope for.” So true.

  5. I love that song too, in a makes-me-cry-and-feel-heavy way. And I think being detached from the past has its own problems.

  6. I think we all have regrets. I think that people that live without regret must be almost kidding themselves. We’ve all done and said things we shouldn’t. Made bad choices and decisions. I think regret keeps things in perspective, and we learn to do things differently next time. If you don’t regret it the first time, what’s stopping you from doing it again?

  7. I really enjoy your Tunes for Tuesday. Some days are just sad.

  8. All we can hope for, indeed.

  9. You’re right Jane; some days that IS all we can hope for. And hopefully, for that day, it’s enough.

    You are a lot like me, an optimistic “Pollyanna” who is WAY too hard on herself.
    You’re not alone.
    Sending warm bloggy hugs.

  10. I feel this song so much. I am a pessimist so I need a Pollyanna in mt life to balance things out. Stay a Pollyanna Jane……please.

  11. Oh wow, I really understand where you’re coming from… today is one of THOSE days for me as well.

    Here’s to a cheerful Wednesday!

  12. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t envy those who seem detached from the past.”

    …..while these people may be envied for the luxury of being oblivious……I think you are a better person for the perspective. It may be “harder” but it makes you more real. more genuine. with more depth.


  13. Have I ever mentioned how much I love you all? 🙂

  14. I really like Paul Simon and Garfunkle (sp?) too 🙂 You know, this really gives away our age (laugh).

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